The "Runway"?

The Runway seems to be an ironic term since no one actually 'runs' down it, and in my opinion running has nothing to do with fashion.

I think running is all about function.  For example spandex shorts are not so flattering on me, but prevent against 'chub rub' when doing long miles in hot, humid temps.  My green "Peter Pan" spandex (see profile picture) don't exactly go with my pink-salmon vest, but the pants make me feel fast, and the vest is bright for visibility and breaks the wind without overheating.  When this ensemble comes together, it is definitely not making any runway shows.  My husband warns me that I may get deported to Canada while out on my runs.  (Apparently in the fashion forward state of Vermont where Carharts and Flannel are like the state uniform, they are judgmental of Canadians' colorful fashion sense).

Thanks to the example set by my high school track coach Mr. Richard Stafford, I learned early on that running is about performance and not about being fashionable.  As much as I might embarrass my family and friends with some of my fashion choices, I know I am not the only one in need of a "What Not to Wear for Runners" makeover.  I'm sure you have seen some of these 'fashionable' people on your runs...

Mr. Rocky Balboa - this guy looks like he is about to enter a boxing match.  He has on real sweat pants - the kind with the elastic bottom like we used to wear in the 80's - I think they sell them at Walmart (mostly in grey, blue or red).  He wears the full outfit complete with the hood on.  He runs real slow - like he is warming up for his boxing match, and is always looking down. 

Mr. Richard Simmons - This Masters runner is still wearing his shorts from three decades ago. Imagine if the NBA players were still in their shorts from the early 80's?!?

Mr. Mass-hole - This guy is the opposite of Richard Simmons - he is wearing basketball shorts down below his knees and they are usually paired with a wife beater tank and sometimes a gold chain.  His 'beater' allows him to show off his Red Sox '04 tattoo.  He is usually moving at a surprisingly quick pace and is always 'running on Dunkin'.

Mr. Spandex -  During one run along the Charles River in Boston, I passed by TWO guys wearing spandex shorts shorter than mine.  If you are wearing shorts like that, you should at least be going fast enough to not get passed by a girl.

Mr./Mrs. Gear - They have all the latest and greatest in tech apparel, a fuel belt stashed with GUs and sports drinks, calf and arm sleeves, a dry fit hat and sweat band, an arm band for his i-pod, GPS watch, a heart rate monitor, sunglasses ... you get the picture.  It wouldn't be a surprise to find out that this runner is actually training for a triathlon. 

Mr. or Mrs. (?) I can only see your eyeballs - Literally, that is the only body part exposed.  This runner is tough, and has bundled everything up to brave the harsh winter elements.  He/she could probably use her balaclava to rob a gas station after her run, but, it is functional - especially up in VT!

Ms. "yo mama let you out the house like that?" - She is usually a college student and wearing way too few clothes for the weather (but still more than she wears on a Saturday night).  Sometimes there is a group of young men running behind at a slightly slower pace. 

I enjoy seeing these people on my runs - they are distracting and entertaining.  They might be thinking the same thing about me.  I run for myself,  I run to get faster and compete, I run to release stress, I run to stay healthy, I run for fun ... I do not run to win any fashion awards.  I choose my apparel based on weather, comfort, fit, mood, and sometimes on superstition.  Some days I look like a runner, others like I could be on Broadway alongside Tinkerbell, but I always feel like a runner!